Erin:
You were absolutely right and I am elated! The most current website
Government WIC site says the following: Women, Infants and Children
Breastfeeding Promotion and Support in WIC
Research has shown that there is no better food than breast milk for a
baby’s first year of life. Breastfeeding provides many health,
nutritional, economical and emotional benefits to mother and baby.
Since a major goal of the WIC Program is to improve the nutritional
status of infants, WIC mothers are encouraged to breastfeed their
infants. WIC has historically promoted breastfeeding to all pregnant
women as the optimal infant feeding choice, unless medically
contraindicated. * WIC mothers choosing to breastfeed are provided
information through counseling and breastfeeding educational materials.
* Breastfeeding mothers receive follow-up support through peer
counselors. * Breastfeeding mothers are eligible to participate in WIC
longer than non-breastfeeding mothers. * Mothers who exclusively
breastfeed their infants receive an enhanced food package. *
Breastfeeding mothers can receive breast pumps, breast shells or
nursing supplementers to help support the initiation and continuation
of breastfeeding.
http://www.fns.usda.gov/wic/Breastfeeding/breastfeedingmainpage.HTM
By Kelly
By Kelly
Erin:
That is awesome news! Thanks for taking the time to post that.
By Kelly
Kelly,
I have heard that WIC does give out pumps in some places. I don't know
how common it is, or if they are obligated to do so. It seems to depend
on which WIC office you go to as to how supportive/truly knowledgeable
they are about breastfeeding.
By Erin
Wow!
How we feed our babies is such a touchy topic! I hate that moms can be
so mean to each other...I too feel the wrath should be aimed at the
formula companies who do not have the moms' or the babies' best
interests in mind. Why do you think this site exists? For liberty? No.
with celebrities like Gwen Stefani, Michelle Williams, Maggie
Gyllenhall (sp?) breastfeeding their babies, (along with grassroots
educational efforts and some more enlightened health care providers)
breastfeeding rates are going up. And profits down. I, like the poster
below, agree we should be getting MAD. I don't judge moms...I am
pro-mom! If it is truly your choice (for example I know a mom who was
just uncomfortable with her body, and knew it was for her.) While I
don't agree, that so much different from a mom who wants to b/f and is
sabotaged by mis-information. The latest one (just experienced by my
daughter's art teacher who had a baby 2 weeks ago) is that she needs to
supplement until her milk comes in! What???? You are depriving your
baby of the best of breastfeeding, colostrum. The thing is, new moms
are vulnerable and have responsibility for this tiny, fragile life, and
look to doctors and hospitals to help them. Unless you are very
well-informed and the doctor or nurse says supplement, you will. One
poster said as to the bags that women aren't that dumb. Well, it's not
that, but the women who are most vulnerable to the pitch of the formula
are populations usually low-income women who take what doctors say as
gospel and do not have access to other info. Does WIC pay for pumps and
nursing bras, or just formula? My stance is that any women who wants to
breastfeed should be allowed to succeed and not have to defend herself
against those who would take advantage of her If it's YOUR choice,
amen. I respect that. But in most cases I know, moms gave up and felt
guilty because of events that compounded with bad and harmful advice.
Your feeding freedom, yes. The formula companies freedom to make more
money off your babies' health no! It's just too bad that a mom who
wants to breastfeed her baby has to have the will and determination of
a marathoner just to overcome all the bad advice out there. This site
makes me mad because it propagates all that.
By Kelly
First,
my "Mea Culpa" to JM. Yes, as was pointed out by someone, I was being
sarcastic. I must suffer from a bit of paranoia, exacerbated by
sleep-deprivation, as I was getting the feeling that your post was
(like the original blog postings from Kate and Barb) phony. I see that
I was wrong, and I offer a sincere apology.
Yes, of course I know that reduction mammaplasty will seriously impact
lactation. I have actually worked with two women in that situation
recently. One case followed JM's quite closely.(As most breast
reduction cases have many of the same elements, obviously) The other
was able to bring in a full milk supply after a week of supplementing.
I, for one, doubted that I would ever see that in my career. It has
everthing to do with the original surgery and the time that has lapsed,
among other things, and less to do with the mothers dedication to
nursing. I only mention it because even I, who have high hopes for all
nursing difficulties, never thought I would see that.
Again, my apologies to JM, who I wronly assumed was 1) phony 2)
defending the practice of marketing formula in hospitals. Jamelle
By Jamelle
Yeah,
milk banks are extremely expensive - ridiculously so. And most people
won't offer themselves as wet nurses anymore. Back in "the day," women
were lactating for a large number of their childbearing years and
everyone lived in such tightly-knit communities, so somebody would be
available to nurse a baby who otherwise could not get breastmilk. But
we don't live like that anymore, which I suppose has both its negatives
as well as positives...
And I agree; the comment did sound sarcastic in light of the rest of
the post.
By Erin
I
took Jamelles comment "your situation sounds so plausible" as being a
sarcastic remark since the rest of her post was pretty agressive. I do
feel that many people spout nasty intolerant things at one another as a
mechanism to feel better about themselves. I also agree that we should
be concerned about healthcare costs, and longterm health and
breastfeeding is one way of getting a child off to a good start. I just
wish there were other alternatives we could give our babies if
breastfeeding for long periods of time is not an option.
By JM
I
saw that Jamelle was questioning you on your use of a pump - which was
weird and I couldn't figure out where that was going - I didn't think
she was questioning that you had a physical barrier to milk production.
From what she wrote, it didn't sound like she'd read your entire
situation, though, and then just made comments. If she is still hanging
around here, I would like to hear if she thinks that breast reduction
surgery can affect the ability to produce milk... if she (or anyone)
really thinks it never causes a problem, then I'll argue against that!
It seems that people get so irritated at the moms who stop "just
because" that they don't stop to consider that there are some who stop
because they just never could really get it started due to a physical
issue. Since those cases are rarer than people stopping "just because"
or due to bad info, the people who had a physical barrier unfortunately
get overlooked. I am glad you shared your story because it reminds us
all that sometimes there is a physical reason, and that mothers who
have done everything they can and just cannot get milk really wish that
it hadn't been that way... but when there's nothing else you could have
done, there is nothing to feel guilty about, and nobody else should
make negative comments about it, either.
By Erin
Thanks
Barb:
Your words are thoughtful, balanced and true. For many moms who can't
breastfeed, the failure is absolutely devastating. I cannot imagine how
some of the moms who have posted passionate and/or angry responses to
your blog entry would feel if they themselves were unable to
breastfeed. I hope that over time they--seeing that their child was
healthy, happy and intelligent--would forgive themselves and
concentrate on other ways that they can love their child. At the same
time, they might learn to forgive others who can't or choose not to
breastfeed. Everyone is different. Each person's circumstances are
unique.
Laura
By Laura Cook-Crotty
Erin,
just to clarify...you were stating that no one has said anything about
physical barriers to BF. With all due respect, that is unfortunately
not true. Jamelle for one seems to be dubious about what I had stated
earlier about how Breast Reduction Surgery effects milk production in a
significant way. If she is understanding of human anatomy, what breast
reduction surgery actually is, why its done etc., or perhaps is at
least aware of what breat tissue is composed of, and how breast milk is
produced and excreted, and it shocks me frankly that she would question
my credibility. I don't get it. Why would I make somthing like this up?
The touchy part of all of this is that I really beat myself up for
deciding/needing to stop. It wasn't just a "oh...I don't like this
anymore and its too hard so I think I'll quit" decision. It was a
decision based on many many factors. In fact it was the most depressing
decision I have ever made and its taken me a long time to get over it
(and obviously I'm not over it since I can be hurt so easily when
someone says somthing mean about my choices). For many other mothers
who need to stop for various reasons, it can be incredibly sad and
self-esteem can suffer. Why can't people understand that? Its not an
easy decision for many people. The lack of compassion for some of the
posters here has been unreal...As you stated however, the purpose of
this blog is to eliminate the bags with formula in them because they
are a reason women stop breastfeeding.
By JM
I
agree there have been some rude comments... but I am happy to see many
more positive comments than rude ones! It's a passionate subject, so it
is nice to see many people remaining civil :)
By Erin
JM
- I am really sorry for the confusion. My post was not directed to/at
you. I was referring to my earlier post of how some people on this site
are judgemental and just plain mean & nasty towards others. The
quote "JM Your story sounds so plausable," is in my opinion another
example of meanness.
By ChrisT
Chris,
I don't really understand what you mean, but you are right about me
spending too much time here. This is a sensitive topic for me, and I'm
letting others comments bother me. Thanks for the input.
By JM
Another quote that validates my point below.
"JM Your story sounds so plausable."
If you don't like the site and the people posting on why spend so much time on it?
By ChrisT
I
don't think there are any posters here (or any people in the world who
know a thing or two about breastfeeding) who think that there are never
physical barriers to breastfeeding. Has anyone here said that? I can
see you'd think that Sarah implied it with her broad statement which
she should have not made to seem like it applied to every mother. I
think sometimes people who work so hard on breastfeeding and do succeed
get "touched off" when they hear of so many women who quit under less
stressful or difficult circumstances. They just seem to feel that it
makes them out to have "gotten lucky," when in fact, they struggled
through many hardships to achieve the level of success they had with
breastfeeding. It does not excuse them from making harsh comments, of
course. but I wouldn't think that any harsh comments were being
directed at women who physically are unable to nurse.
The reason nobody is out campaigning against Huggies giving out free
samples in the hospitals (well, maybe somebody is on a small scale -
you never know) is because that is not common practice. My hospital did
not give out diaper samples, nor did any hospitals of friends of mine
who have had babies. I have gotten 2 or 3 Pampers samples in the mail,
though. But it is not a widespread practice, and it is not one that
interferes directly with a mother who is trying to bond with her
newborn. Formula samples are given out in virtually all hospitals in
the US, except those few that have decided to not accept the samples
anymore. The formula samples are something almost every new mother in
the US is given in the hospital. I am glad to see that you do not
support the formula samples being given out. I know you never said
that, but as that is the purpose for this site and somebody else said
you were defending the practices of the formula companies, and I hadn't
seen what your stance was on the sample bags... so I just wanted
clarification.
I must add that how other mothers feed their babies does affect
others... we have to pay for it in higher health care costs, since in
general, formula-fed babies have more illnesses and have a higher
potential down the road for other conditions as adults. So, while it is
no one's right to be rude about it, it is the right of anyone to be
concerned with getting better education and support out there so that
the maximum number of babies who can physically be breastfed will be.
By Erin
Also,
those of you who don't believe in physical limitations to breastfeeding
need to get out more and live in the real world. Perhaps you are the
same individuals that don't believe in Post Partum depression...its
really sad.
By JM
READ
CAREFULLY: I'm not encouraging women to stop breastfeeding. Im not
encouraging formula companies to drop samples in women's bags. Im not
fighting for any bags to be passed out!!!! Im not wanting formula
companies to drop samples in womens bags. Where in my post did I even
mention that? Stanford, where I had my baby, is very pro breastfeeding.
The minute you arrive on the ward, they work with you on how to
breastfeed. The bags they give you DO NOT HAVE ONE SINGLE PACKET OF
FORMULA, but they do have a "Huggies" sample pack. Is huggies giving
the hospital big bucks too? Maybe you should be fignting about that
also. Huggies has so many harsh chemicals that have also been called
into question on a babies health. Why stop at formula? I WANT TO MAKE
MY POINT CRYSTAL CLEAR: I was addressing "Sarah"s totally ignorant and
cruel blanket judgement about mothers not being dedicated to their
babies if they can't breastfeed or if they have to stop breastfeeding
early AND HER LACK OF CONSIDERATION FOR OTHER circumstances... Are they
undedicated if they have to stop because they are taking toxic
chemotherapy drugs for cancer? Are they not dedicated if they have to
stop because they had breast surgery (my situation) and have had milk
ducts severed? Are they not dedicated if they have to stop because they
are taking a medication that is secreted in breastmilk and bad for the
baby? Are they undedicated if they have to stop early because they are
severly depressed and suicidal?
What other women do about breastfeeding is really not anyone's
business. Passing judgement on other women about their choice to
breastfeed or not to and connecting it to their parenting ability is
UNJUST AND CLOSEMINDED. How does it effect you? Why do you care so
much? I will defend myself if I am being told I am undedicated, or
"quit when it gets too hard". I have no choice but to defend myself.
I'm not speaking for anyone else but myself. If you can call a person
undedicated if they don't breastfeed for physical reasons, than you are
saying that ONE MUST BREASTFEED A BABY AT ANY COST BOTH PHYSICAL AND
EMOTIONAL...who cares if you and your baby are happy, as long as you
are breastfeeding.
By JM
JM,
I don't know exactly what your stance is on the free formula samples
given to each mother before she leaves the hospital... but the practice
of formula companies providing these samples (and paying the hospitals
to do so) is their way of actively trying to make more women turn to
their products and therefore, to not breastfeed at all or to breastfeed
for a shorter duration. So, if you support these formula bags being
handed out - meaning you'd fight for them to remain in the hospitals -
then you are defending the unethical practices of the formula
companies, intentionally or not. Does that make sense? This does not
mean that formula would be disallowed in hospitals - just that
companies could not use the hospitals to do their marketing on
vulnerable new mothers. By the way, I can see how you'd feel a little
attacked - it did seem that your story was being called into question,
and this is not about arguing the breastfeeding vs formula feeding
issues anyway (not that you had any real choice in the matter anyway -
it was physically not possible for you) - it's about the formula sample
bags.
By Erin
Oh,
and "Jamelle" please explain to me how I am "defending the practice of
ACTIVELY trying to get women not to breastfeed, to breastfeed for
shorter duration, and to purchase their higher proced brands". You need
to read carefully every post before you start making accusations like
that. Ignorant.
By JM
Jamelle, what
are you talking about? You don't make sense. You write "Why are you
defending the practice of ACTIVELY trying to get women not to
breastfeed, to breastfeed for shorter duration, and to purchase their
higher proced brands"? How dare you accuse me of that. I am not
ACTIVELY trying to get women not to breastfeed. Thats totally
ridiculous and an ignorant thing to say. Obviously you can't read or
your reading comprehension is lacking because you missed my point
entirely. I was defending MYSELF and reacting to the statement by sarah
that just because I stopped BF after 3 months doesnt mean I am not
dedicated to my daughter, and there are other women in the same boat as
me who had to stop but tried very hard AND are dedicated to their
children. Oh, and the hospital grade pump that I rented for 3 months
was useless doing both breasts at the same time because since I had a
breast reduction, the only way to get milk out was to manually express
with one hand while holding on to the pump with the other. I can't
believe I'm being attacked.
By JM
JM
Your story sounds so plausable. You certainly sound dedicated to
breastfeeding. Why are you defending the practice of ACTIVELY trying to
get women not to breastfeed, to breastfeed for shorter duration, and to
purchase their higher proced brands!
In addition (and I apologize in advance if I am incorrect) I found one
flaw in your beautifully written story. If you had indeed rented a
'hospital grade pump', why were you pumping for "30 minutes, 15
muinutes on each side". Hospital grade pumps are usually set up to pump
both breasts at once.
By Jamelle
This
site is funded by the International Formula Council, which represents
the $4 billion dollar formula industry. Every time a mother
successfully puts a baby to her breast, they lose a sale.
"Breastfeeding horror stories" aren't evidence that "formula is fine"
-- they show that our health care system delivers terrible care for
nursing mothers. Physicians and nurses receive minimal, if any, formal
training on how to manage breastfeeding problems. But they receive
millions of dollars worth of books, meals, and gifts from the formula
industry. When hospitals market formula, formula sales representatives
have free access to patient floors, where they pitch their products to
nurses. A sales training manual for Ross Pediatrics puts it plainly:
"Never underestimate the importance of nurses. If they are sold and
serviced properly, they can be strong allies. A nurse who supports Ross
is like an extra salesperson." There can't be "feeding freedom" for
mothers until the health care system starts taking breastfeeding
seriously. Step one is banning formula sales reps and their free
samples from hospitals and medical offices.
By Alison
Also,
no one that I read stated that breastmilk "starves" babies. In my case
I was physically unable to produce enough milk to satisfy my daughter
(due to a breast reduction 13 years ago). Many women including myself
who switch to formula do not just "give up when it gets too difficult".
I perservered for 3 months but no matter how much I pumped, nursed,and
took mothers milk supplements I had physical limitations that would
prenvent me from making more milk because some of my milk ducts were
cut during my breast surgery. Oh, and consequently, the hospital that I
was at DOES NOT give formula samples out to the patients. Breastfeeding
is what all patients are encouraged to do first and foremost.
By JM
I
agree that this site being funded by a formula company takes away its
credibility and makes everything about it fraudulent. I just felt that
her valid arguement might have been presented in a less sarcastic way.
Its an important point.
By JM
point
cam e across loud and clear to em... may have been a different way to
approach it than most of the other comments, but it sure was effective
- I think the people who created this site will get the point that many
people seem to think they don't have mothers' interests as their
primary concern, especially being funded by formula.
By R
Kay, why must you be so sarcastic? Its not an effective way of getting your point accross.
By JM
Thanks
so much for yet another "give up as soon as it quits being easy!"
perspective! I fully agree that no mother should be expected to put any
effort into childrearing. It's completely unfair to expect us to try or
persevere when things get tough. Why should we try when we've got
formula, which is better than breastmilk in so many ways! (Just read
the stories on here! Breastmilk starves babies and daddies aren't able
to bond! Evil breastmilk!) I can tell the women who run this site truly
care about babies and their moms! That's why there's so much factual
information here! And of course, it's definitely not just a sly
marketing scheme funded by formula companies to advance their formula
bag cause. I mean, they give those bags out because they're such kind
hearted people, not because they know what a huge negative impact they
have on breastfeeding rates! It's not like they're real companies that
are out to snag as many new moms as possible to maximize their profit
or anything!
And I'm so glad that the website was so honest when they discussed the
"benefits" of breastfeeding. I mean, why should they get into things
like the dramatic increase of SIDS and upper respiratory infections
when babies are formula fed? That just makes people feel guilty, and
anyway, it's not like a nurse would have any clue what the AAP says
about those things! Water it down and leave as much out as possible,
THAT'S how you educate, empower, and support women!
Thanks again!
By Kay
JM,
I cannot speak for Sarah, but I doubt she was referring to cases such
as yours. Breast surgery is a real, true physical thing that can affect
milk production. You obviously put forth much effort to see if you
could produce enough. Yours, and any other case where a mother
physically could not produce enough or any milk, is not an example of a
mother being undedicated... in fact, it is quite the opposite! You
could have just assumed you wouldn't be able to make milk and not
tried, but you put forth quite an effort, and I think you know that
this does indeed make you quite dedicated. I believe Sarah's comment
was about mothers who don't have a physical problem with milk
production and either stop before they've really had a chance to get
the hang of it or stop because they are given bad advice and
misinformation and don't look into it any farther themselves. And
remember - any amount of breastmilk your baby got - no matter how small
- was beneficial!!!
By Erin
Correction to my entry...omit the "By JM By Sarah" at the end.
By JM
I
am so sick of people stating that not breastfeeding for the first year
is no being dedicated to your child. I had a breast reduction surgery
13 years ago when I was 23. I had it because of back and neck problems
due to large breasts and have been painfree ever since. That was 13
years ago. I knew that the consequences of a breast reduction might be
a difficulty or inability to breastfeed. When I was 23, I wasn't sure I
even wanted children so there was no question in my mind that this was
the best choice for me. Then at 36 I became pregnant and decided I
wanted to breastfeed. When I was 7 months pregnant I went to an LC,
bought and read the book Breastfeeding after Breast Reduction Surgery,
purchased fenugreek, and mothers milk tablets. Rented a hospital grade
breastpump. After I had my daughter, I took the supplements, pumped and
nursed every two hours (including all night long), massaged my breasts
and visualised the milk flowing. Well this all eventually worked after
5 days after her birth. Unfortunately, my daughter was starving, and
had reached the cutoff for the allowed decrease in birthweight (She was
born at 6.9 and left the hospital at 5.14). I didn't make enough milk
to satisfy my hungry baby. At 2 weeks I began to supplement with a
little formula at the advice of my daughters MD and LC because she
wasn't gaining enough. I was awake literally all night on a schedule of
nursing for 45 minutes then pumping for 30 min (15 minutes on each
side) every one and a half to two hours. I had mastitis, and post
partum depression on top of all that. But I didn't want to give up
because I wanted my daughter to have the most breastmilk I could give
her. At 3 months I went on an antideppressant and for a multitide of
reasons and at the advice of 3 doctors and my LC, I decided to stop
nursing. My daughter was starving and becoming frustrated with nursing
because my flow wasnt' fast enough. No matter how much I pumped and
nursed, I would never make enough to satisfy her because of my surgery.
Does this make me a bad mother? According to Sarah, "Giving your child
the best start to life and health is worth doing. That is, if you're
dedicated to your child." Does this mean that its better for me to have
a baby thats crying, frustrated and hungry all the time as long as shes
breastfeeding? Am I not dedicated to my child if I tried as hard as I
could to breastfeed for longer than 3 months but needed to switch to
formula because I didn't make enough milk? After I switched, my baby
stopped crying all the time and so did I. Tell me what I could have
done differently.
By JM
By Sarah
By JM
In my
case, the formula samples were a way to get the crying mother out of
the way so they could see someone else and keep their billing up. They
weren't willing to take the time to see what the problem was--why my
baby and I weren't getting it. No one bothered to look in the baby's
mouth and see that he can't latch on properly because he's tongue tied.
It was so obvious once I learned about tongue tie, but by then it was
too late to do anything about our nursing relationship. And the damage
to his health was already done.
Yes, sometimes it's time to admit that this mom isn't going to be able
to breastfeed her child. Perhaps her breast surgery damaged her milk
ducts and she isn't producing. Perhaps she has something really rare
and strange about her breast physiology. But if she doesn't have
physical issues and wants to nurse her baby, she should get as much
support and information and help as it takes to make it happen!
By Sam
Anything that's worth doing isn't easy.
Giving your child the best start to life and health is worth doing.
That is, if you're dedicated to your child.
By Sarah
ChrisT,
Read my comment two below yours. This is not about anyone being "holier
than thou." This is about helping moms to get all the information and
clear up misconceptions so they can make an informed choice. If they
have all the info and still choose to formula feed due to another
personal issue, then that is their right. Obviously, if there is some
problem that would cause them to be absolutely miserable while
breastfeeding, then nobody should try to make them feel bad about it or
force them to do otherwise. But in many cases (maybe not yours, I don't
know), women begin using formula due to the many myths about babies not
gaining enough, feeding "too frequently," "allergic" to mom's milk, bad
advice given by doctors, and so on. If moms really want freedom in
feeding choices, then they need to wake up to all the misinformation
out there so they can really make an informed choice. And yes,
sometimes that choice, despite having all the true facts, will still be
formula... but it would be the choice for far fewer mothers than it is
today with all the misconceptions out there. I do think moms have a big
responsibility to look into the research themselves, but doctors and
other medical professionals have a duty to keep on top of the truth and
to not distribute false or misleading info regarding breastfeeding.
By Erin
Jean,
Are you suggesting that because you needed free samples that they
should be foisted on every mother? That by not permitting companies
from marketing in hospitals that they would not be able to figure out
another way to reach you? We're vastly underestimating the marketers
imagination. If laws were passed to prohibit marketing in hospitals
(which every study shows would increase the percentage of mothers who
do breast feed), then the marketers would make deals with various baby
stores, grocery stores and other places new mothers go. They would find
you and figure out how to give you free things. Let's not keep letting
them have access to hospitals simply because its the easiest thing for
them. Also, most laws don't prohibit free samples of formula
completely. Doctors would still be permitted to provide free samples,
just as they provide free samples of other things (like prescription
drugs). The law seeks to stop having formula handed out to everyone.
I also suspect that you probably could afford to have purchased a
couple of different kinds of formula to try them out even without the
free samples. Perhaps if these laws were passed, formula companies
would start marketing smaller sized buckets of their formula to help
parents try out different types of formula. Are you really willing to
prevent other mothers from getting their best possible start with
breastfeeding because you don't want to spend money on formula?
By Db
Wow
- I guess the two things that I have found really amazing on the site
are: 1) the "holier than thou" mentality that some of the posters have
and 2) just how mean and nasty some of those same people get when they
hide behind the web. The reality is that we live in a country dedicated
to principle of freedom – freedom of speech, freedom of choice. When my
children were born, I choose to bottle feed them. The reasons are not
important. What is important is that I made the decision – yes me.
By ChrisT
All one
has to do is look through the "stories" the IFC has decided to post
here, and the "information" they are sharing, and some of the stories
shared by moms here in the blog comments or the discussion forums, to
see that in fact, MOST WOMEN ARE NOT RECEIVING ACCURATE INFORMATION AND
SUPPORT FROM THEIR DOCTORS AND NURSES. They are not to blame for that.
All they can do is educate themselves and try to prevent themselves
from being sabotaged the next time. But it's time for all of us women
to quit buying the formula companies' lies. Mothers who were "unable to
breastfeed" because of sabotage from babytraining books, health care
providers, and/or formula companies --- should stop feeling guilty, and
start being MAD that they and their bab(ies) have been robbed of
something so precious, from both a health and and emotional standpoint.
By TK
This is not about
passing judgment. This is not about trying to make mothers feel guilty
or act like some mothers are better than others. this is about
supporting mothers, and the best way to do that is with EDUCATION.
Mothers need supportive people who also know the facts and don't try to
feed into the raw postpartum emotions or just look for a quick fix.
They need knowledgeable support, and it is clear from these particular
comments that many mothers are not getting that and are instead getting
myths and misinformation. i have gotten to the point where I really
don't think there are many cases where you can truly blame a mother for
not breastfeeding - you can only blame her lack of information and
support. If mothers had better education on breastfeeding, they would
know the following:
* Babies hardly ever truly wean before 18-24 months of age. Before that
age, it is called a nursing strike, which can be caused by numerous
things.
* Babies with allergies are the ones who most benefit from breastmilk
for as long as is possible. Any formula will be harder on their system
and contain foreign proteins and other things their systems may not
tolerate well, especially if they are allergic. The first
recommendation made by a dr. knowledgeable on breastfeeding is that the
mother should do an elimination diet. I know this through research and
firsthand, as I was on a strict elimination diet for this issue myself.
* Women today just don't have the same support we used to have - we
aren't raised around our mothers, aunts, sisters, cousins having
multiple babies, nursing for extended periods, etc. It is harder today
- much harder without having grown up with so many opportunities for
learning about nursing. We do need LCs today for sure - and we'd
benefit so much more if we'd had opportunities to see people nursing
close-up for most of our young lives.
* Putting newborns on a nursing schedule is a sure way to decrease
supply in many mothers. Newborns have to eat frequently. Newborns do
*not* nurse every four hours. that is the schedule for a formula-fed
baby. Breastmilk digests much faster, so those babies will nurse much
more frequently.
* Mothers who attempt to induce lactation can rarely produce a full
supply that will satisfy and infant with no need for supplements. Most
moms who induce lactation will need to supplement with formula or with
expressed milk obtained elsewhere. The important thing is that they are
trying, and that their babies may get some breastmilk where they would
otherwise have not. It is commendable that a mother even attempt it -
in no way is she a failure for not producing a full supply!
None of these facts above are meant to pass judgment - they are simply
facts I have learned in my many years of studying this subject, reading
info from various breastfeeding experts and doctors, and so on. being
completely educated on breastfeeding is the first step to a successful
breastfeeding experience. It's a shame so many doctors are misinformed
and pass that misinformation on to patients. I do not judge or pity
moms who were given misinformation... I just want things to change so
that more babies can be breastfed.
By Erin
Thank
God my pediatrician told me that my newborn son wasn't screaming
because he was just circumcised, but because he was hungry. She offered
me a prepared bottle of formula (free sample from the manufacture),
which I humbly accepted on behalf of my 3 day old son. He sucked that
bottle dry and then entered his blissful baby sleep. My son was born to
us via a gestational carrier, “gc”. He’s from our embryos, but after
10+ miscarriages, we finally decided that if we were every able to hold
a baby in our arms we would need a lot of help. I did everything during
“our pregnancy”. I went to every doctor visit with our gc. I made sure
she had everything she needed, and that she was comfortable with all
our decisions… but that’s an entirely different story with a very happy
ending for all of us (we’re still great friends).
I wanted to breastfeed with all my heart. I got on the internet and
researched how adoptive mothers were able to breastfeed. I got
medications, herbs, and rented a super duper breast pump form out local
hospital. Before my son was born, I started the medicines and pumping
to bring in my milk… that meant a pumping schedule same as a newborn…
every 4 hours. And I did it, I got up in the middle of the night and
pumped, just trying to get a drop. And I did, I was able to produce
breast milk. I would be able to feed my son. I was soooooo happy. I
read all the books on newborns and breastfeeding. The books warned me
not to take home any formula; least I succumb to a formula feeding in
the middle of the night, and never go back to breast milk. Those books
also told me not to let my son have a pacifier, ever… I won’t even
start talking about that. Thank goodness I took those little bags and
free samples when I left the hospital with my son. I was exhausted from
getting up in the middle of the night and feeding my son (the breast
milk our gc had expressed for our son, a gift she gave him the first
month of his life), settling him down again, and then going into the
spare room to begin my pumping ordeal with the breast pump…. Only to
get less then an ounce….
My breasts were just not going to produce enough milk for a baby. Those
books never told me that I might end up starving my child as I
attempted to bring in more milk. Maybe they knew a good pediatrician
like the one we have would be there to guide me and my crying infant.
Thanks goodness for infant formula. My son is now 3 and in the 100%
range for height and weight. He’s very athletic, quite verbal for a
3yo, very social, potty trained… and the love of our lives. I can’t
believe anyone would spend time and effort to legislate against infant
formulas and free samples. Cigerattes, ok… no free samples… but infant
formula????? I loved those free samples… my son 3 days old… had a
preference. With one brand he’d finish his bottle and drift off to baby
sleep… with the other he’d sort of fight it, eventually finishing it….
So I brought the first one. Free samples are a good thing.
By Jean
In response to M, if I had lived 100 years ago, neither my baby or I would have survived the delivery.
By Lucky Mom
I
think the greatest thing missing in the whole breast or bottle debate
is compassion. Compassion for the mother. I would have done anything to
breastfeed my first child; and honestly, I felt I did. I had a
difficult delivery during which my baby broke his clavicle and I
hemorraged and lost a lot of blood. I needed to remain in the hospital
longer than normal and when I was sent home I was told not to get out
of bed for a week. In addition, my baby had difficulty latching on and
because of the cracked clavicle, had to be held only certain ways. I
was a mess. My nipples cracked and bled. I was so weak and so
overwhelmed. My husband found a lactation specialist to help me, but no
matter what I tried, my nipples bled and bled. I would cry in pain when
I would try to nurse. One day after my son tried nursing, I saw that
his mouth was full of my blood. I finally said ENOUGH. I felt like the
biggest failure. Strangers felt they had the right to say rude things
to me and pass judgement on me because I wasn't nursing. I did what my
doctor and I both thought was best for my child and me. I was later
able to breastfeed my next 2 babies and I'm glad that I did. But I was
not a bad mother to my first child or a failure because I couldn't
breasfeed him. People need to stop assuming that they know what's best
for others. Mothering is tough enough, give each other a break.
By JF
As
a mother who had alot of difficulty breastfeeding, I cannot understand
why anyone would try to make a mother feel bad for not breastfeeding.
Sure, it is truly the best thing for the baby, but it is not always
feasible. I suffer from flat nipples so it was very difficult. Yes, I
tried nipple guards, niple shields and all of the other tricks. My
oldest child eventually weaned himself at 10 weeks. My youngest child
received breastmilk until he was 9 months. I chose to pump then give it
to him in a bottle. We stopped before 12 months because he had
allergies and needed to be on a food elimination diet. I was happy with
my choice to try and breastfeed as long as possible. I do not feel as
though a woman should be made to feel guilty if she does not want to or
cannot breastfeed. Women need support not grief from narrow-minded
females!
By Terri
I'm
trying to help a friend who recently had her second child navigate this
issue. Watching her struggle, listening to the passionate views
expressed here and remembering my own two vastly different experiences
with breastfeeding makes me painfully aware, once again, that this is a
decision laden with anguish for most women. We are all very hard on
ourselves as mothers. But we are even harder on each other. And that's
a shame. To TK's point, a more supportive environment is always
helpful. But maybe that should start with being more accepting of one
another. As a Mom who had trouble breast-feeding, reached out to
lactation experts and doctors for support, endured my father-in-law's
criticism of my troubles ("the Indians have been doing it for hundreds
of years without experts!")and pumped milk in my company's broom closet
for months before "giving up," I can say that the weight of other
women's judgment made the whole event more painful and stressful than
it probably needed to be. I doubt this is a decision any woman makes
frivolously.
By Mary
Imagine
if all of the people who say they can't breastfeed today because of
medical reasons lived 100 years ago. There would have been starving and
dead babies everywhere. It's so ridiculous.
If I had a dollar for every woman I've met whose thinks her breasts
don't work, I wouldn't have to work another day in my life. It's truly
sad, that we have 2 generations of women now who don't trust their
bodies to feed their babies.
By M
In
Norway, where there is far more support for breastfeeding (NO FREE
FORMULA BAGS, formula is available only by prescription, there is a
good maternity leave and support for women pumping while at work) -- do
you know what percent of women, in 1999, were exclusively breastfeeding
when their infants were 3 months of age?
92%
(WHO data link here:
http://www.who.int/research/iycf/bfcf/bfcf.asp?menu=21&cID=NOR-SWE-USA&iID=&yID=&ok=true#)
Researchers believe that approximately 95-98% of woman/infant dyads
would be unable to exclusively breastfeed (that means, if one can't,
they don't count the other either). The problem isn't that we don't
recognize that breastfeeding can be difficult. It is simply that there
isn't the education and support to get mothers through the
difficulties. The mother in the article mentioned is entirely capable
of breastfeeding her next infant, at the very least. These "awful"
cases are used to justify lots of women not even trying at all, and
that's sad for them and their babies.
By TK
I
think the problem is that so many women have been scared into thinking
that these problems that make breastfeeding impossible are much more
common than they actually are. Women worry that they won't be able to
breastfeed, so they don't even give it a try. Or they'll encounter a
problem and have no information or support to correct the problem, and
so they have to stop breastfeeding. Our society is into "quick fixes,"
and formula is a quick fix for a lot of women. For some, it really is
the only option, or the best option. But for most women who end up
using formula, there really is no physical need for it, and both they
and their babies would be healthier and happier if they chose to
breastfeed.
By Amy
